“Conscious Dating”- “Finding the Love of Your Life & the Life That You Love”

Although as a coach I do not coach people in personal relationships, there is such a need for help in finding a life partner that there are a number of coaches whose entire practice is relationship coaching. Over 40 million Americans look at on-line dating sites each month. The author of this book, David Steele, ran a therapy practice as a marriage counselor for many years before he realized he would be more successful using coaching skills with his clients. The author has been through the mill in his own life, experiencing many of the dating challenges people face along the way, including the breakup of two marriages including his marriage to a woman with a prescription drug addiction, and then ultimately finding his true-life partner.

This book sprinkles many true-life stories throughout its pages to illustrate the trials, tribulations and successes that the book discusses. The author discusses why “dating” as many of us know it does not work, and spends a reasonable amount of time on the “Fourteen Dating Traps” we can fall into and the “The Opportunity of Being Single.”

The author goes through what he calls the ten principles of conscious dating including such topics as “Know Who You Are and What You Want,” Be Ready and Available for Commitment,” and Create a Support Community.” As stated in the book – “Ten Principles of Conscious Dating will give you the information and tools you need to make good relationship choices while single. These choices can result in the life and relationship you really want. While there is no quick fix, I think you will find that “Conscious Dating” is very doable and can set you on a path that will help you find your life partner sooner than you might expect as you are living the life that you love.”

“To be successful in a career, we know that we need education, training, experience and effort. Why do we expect it to be any different in a relationship? Mating is an ancient drive that ensures survival of our species, and we seem to take it for granted that we know how to do so without a manual. However, getting together is not nearly as much a challenge as staying together. Staying together depends upon you being clear about what you want, and your ability to acquire the knowledge and skills to make it happen.”

Except for one story in the appendix of the book, this book is not about “fluff.” This book is a serious, at times in your face, look at yourself and your readiness to find a life long partner. It is a workbook to prepare you to find the partner that will meet your needs for a sustainable relationship. Completing the many exercises and questions within the book will help you to find happiness within yourself and the confidence to living a committed life. I recommend this book for those who are recently out of a relationship, those who have been single for a long time, and for couples who have recently decided that “this could be (or is) the one.”

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